First Confusionist Miracle Reported: The Healing Of The Hot Horse
A Confusionist from the suburbs of Washington DC reported the first Confusionist miracle when her dying horse, Bandit (pictured right), sprung back to life after she prayed for the divine intervention from Bunkum, the God of Confusionism.
To celebrate the occasion, Bandit has been canonised and made the Patron Saint of Particularly Sick Horses; whereas Alie, the horse's owner has been promoted to Cyber-Priestess and is hotly tipped to rise up the ranks of Confusionism in the future.
The Cyber-Pope has ordered all Confusionists to eat lots of delicious cakes to mark the miracle of the hot horse. Here's the email we received:
Email from Cyber-Priestess Alie, formerly known as Cyber-Nun Alie
Cyber-Pope, I would like to report the first Confusionist miracle!
My horse has been sick with a very high fever (106 F). Medications were not working for him. The vet could not help him. Even the much revered herbal treatments had no effect.
All was lost.....or so it seemed.
As I was driving out to the barn today, I asked Bunkum (the atheist god of Confusionism) to please help him get better, and bring down the fever.
I said that if he lowered my horses fever that it would cement my faith in Confusionism and inspire me to work harder at recruiting members.
Lo and behold, about a minute after I asked Bunkum, I get a call saying that my horse's fever has miraculously returned to normal! He was now in much better spirits, eating and drinking, and he had a normal temperature!
The vet came out later that day and proclaimed that it was a miracle! (As I knew all along, having prayed to Bunkum.)
Thank you, thank you, thank you Cyber-Pope for advocating such a wonderful (and fast-working) religion!!!!
Cyber-Nun Alie ----who feels that her faith in Bunkum should bump her up to a Cyber-Priestess
(BTW, this is an actually true story, and it really did happen. My horse was almost on his deathbed. I was ready to take him to an Equine Hospital if his fever didn't break today, but thanks to Confusionism, it did!!!!)
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